Saturday, May 7, 2011

Perspective from the Partyin' mama

This pile along with what is in the basket behind is what awaits me this morning.  Am I excited about it?  Um, NO!  Am I thankful for it?  YES!  I know.  You are probably wondering if my life is that boring aren't you?  No it isn't.  There are lots of things I had rather be doing but duty calls.  I looked at this pile & counted it a blessing.  This pile means that my dreams were fulfilled because God is faithful.  I can remember as a little girl wanting to just grow up & be a mama.  I had never really cared if I had boys or girls.  I think every little girl wants to grow up & have a little girl.  But God knows best & He knew I couldn't deal with a minnie me, so instead He gave us our two healthy boys.  This time 17 years ago I was waiting ever so anxiously to hold the first one.  I had a few weeks left to go though.  But I was so excited.  Then just two years and nine months later, I was waiting anxiously again.  They both keep me on my toes, running to the grocery store for milk, dr.pepper, gatorade's, and FOOD, basketball games, home for shoes or something they forgot.  And yes, to the laundry room because they need something washed.  But I wouldn't trade it for anything.  I would be lying if I said it isn't exhausting.  Any mother reading this will agree.  But this pile of clothes means a lot to me.  It means they are healthy enough to get them dirty.   They are healthy enough to sweat and stink.  (I know too much information, but true)  I have friends who have children serving in Afghanistan, Iraq, or somewhere else in this world & I am sure they would love to wash a load of their laundry today.  I have friends who have sent their sweet children on to sit with Jesus & wait for them to get there.  I am sure they would love to wash a load of their laundry today also. 

I am not real sure why Solomon or whomever it would have been, would put verses 10-31 in Proverbs 31, but non the less, they are there.  I wonder how many women have set themselves up for destruction because they have tried to be this woman.  I am sure it was written by a man.  Maybe not because it was his expectations of a woman, but because maybe, just maybe, it was what his mother did.  Mothers these days wear lots of hats.  Some because they want to, others because they have no choice. 
I will have to be honest, I have tried to be this woman to some degree.  I can't say that I have bought & sold land though.  (I leave all that up to D)  It took a while for me to just finally surrender & just let God lead & me follow.  It took a while for me to find my niche in being a mother for our boys.  You know, what may work for you, doesn't work for me.  I know lots of moms who have tried to do it like someone else. " They just seem to have it all together".  God created us all differently & not a one of our kids are alike.  Not one.  Even though these two boys here have the same mama & daddy, same blood, same roots, they are as different as night & day.  And I wouldn't have it any other way. 

Yes, there are times when I am completely drained.  Physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually, not an ounce left to give to anybody.  But that is where my strength has to fall completely on my Jesus.  I have to fall on Him & let Him lead me, & guide me even more that usual. 

I encourage all of you ladies reading this today, old & young,  mothers who have grandchildren, mothers who will enjoy their first ever mothers day, give up on high expectations of everyone else and let God guide you & lead you to be the mother He wants you to be not the mother you want to be.  Life is alot easier that way.  Not so much pressure.  And the next time you want to fuss about laundry, cooking, cleaning, count them as blessings.  It just means that God has entrusted alot to you.  Entrusted is a big word.  It just means He trusted us enough to place His greatest and most prized possessions in our hands. 
I know I am and have been found guilty of fussing.  Alot.  But I am usually quick to remember that if they weren't here, my life would be so boring. 
So yes, that pile of clothes, I will gladly wash today.  Because I am the mama of the two who put them there.  They are my blessings.  My boys.  The two boys who turned my whole world around.  I wouldn't trade them in even on our worst day.  They were entrusted to me and I am ever so thankful.  I love you both!!!

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